#8: Invisibility Cloak

You don't need to be a Wizard to understand the tremendous number of uses for this cloak. I must say that if there's one thing J.K. Rowling falters with is the mischievous, rather, devious side of young wizards. I don't think many teenagers (at the very least, teenage guys) would fail to at least consider the perverse and sneaky things one could do with this cloak. That is not to say that I support any of those things, just that I feel they're important to mention when discussing the teenage psyche.

Anyway, my uses for the cloak include: living at home rent free and being able to appear out of the house, i.e., free of guff from my family, when I was really just writing this blog or pretending to study for the LSAT; scaring the bejeeezus out of everyone that I know, often; definitely figuring out some way to Rob a bank; lending it out to the military for vast sums of money to combat terrorism; avoiding mugging in any bad neighborhood anywhere; watching games/professional sports(basketball, football, baseball, etc.) courtside, fielside etc.; tripping Tom Brady, Ben Roethlisberger, Terrell Owens, Eli Manning, and a host of other athletes every time they tried to move on the field or court; solving mysteries; getting to the front of any line; staying after hours in amusement parks; getting out of the box; never suffering through another walk of shame again; bail on checks, tabs, or any kind of food service industry bill; bail on a bad date; hooking up in extraordinary locations (e.g., The 50-yard line of the Linc); political assassinations; never again be caught as the guy who just made the bathroom unbearable; frame people I don't like, plant evidence, etc.

I know I've missed some of the ways to take advantage of invisibility. Please comment with your uses for the invisibility cloak.